Dear Mr. McDonald (NaNo 2011)

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Chapter 1The Story Begins

Old McDonald had a farm; he also had 56 milk cows most of which were very headstrong and independent, the rest just followed along. Those cows gave milk to: him, his four sons (who were next door), and his daughter (across the street), and whoever bought it, all of which drink A LOT of milk. Most of his neabors had at least one cow. Yup, there was a lot to go around, and milk was very important, because the only store close by was 30 minutes away, and nobody wanted to go that far for something like milk. So everyone had a cow, or had a friend with a cow, or had a neighbor with a cow who would sell them milk, and almost everyone got there milk from Mr. McDonald, but like most things, something happened to him unactspectly. Late at night there was footsteps in his house very loud ones, most people would call “stomps” but I’m not “most people” so I can say what I want. Where were we? Ah yes footsteps in his house, BIG ones, it went: “Clop Clop Clop Clop” and so on and so forth. The creature had a letter in its hand, it read…


Dear Mr. McDonald,

I have some matters I believe merit your attention, first of all, this milking only in the morning and night really has upset my schedule, and is rude. Furthermore I think the way you gave me a name like “Bossy” is very unbecoming of you, and how you take our calf’s away and sell them is just plain cruil.I hope you take to mind these things and try to change, if not I shall have to stop giving milk for you.


Bossy B. Holstein, for the species: Cow.

This of course would be very startling for one to see in those parts someone may even shoot, but the next day, Mr. McDonald found the note on his bedside table, underestimating the power of cattle he threw it away thinking nothing of it, he went on with is chores and forgot about it completely. The next day he got another letter from the unbelievable writer.


Dear Mr. McDonald,

Seeing that you have not changed and continue to treat me rudely I shall indeed go on “strike” so you call it, but since I am such fantastic cow, I shall let you earn your milk.


Bossy B. Holstein, for the species: Cow.

The morning he found that note, he realized that this was actually happening, and that he would have to earn his milk from now on, understandingly he wrote back…


Dear Mrs. Bossy,

I am extremely sorry for my behavior, and I hope you will believe that this mistake shall never happen again. Excuse me but what would you have in mind for me to do to earn this milk?


Harold O. McDonald

After he wrote this he went out to the barn where he kept his cows for the night. Not knowing which cow had written the letter (for he called all his cows’ bossy) he pinned it up on the side of the barn, actiously awaiting his next letter.

Chapter 2 Odd Enough for Ya?

The next morning he woke up and noticed a new letter was on his bedside table. So he read it…


Dear Mr. McDonald,

Thank you for the splendid apology. as for work, you can come out and milk us every day, in the morning, noon, afternoon, and night, and you should call us all by our names, I here’s a piece of paper with all our name’s on it, and also you are required to keep all our calf’s be them boy or girl, and last of all, treat us with respect. Learn and obey these rules and you shall get all the milk you want, but if not bad things will happen.


Bossy B. Holstein, for the species: Cow.

He hopped out of bed and got his working clothes on right then and there, while he did this he was trying to think about how in the world he was going to milk 56 cows, four times a day. That night he said to him-self “I CAN’T do this tomorrow” so he started making a plan. The next morning making very sure there was not a letter on his bedside table he got his clothes on and ran out the door, but this time it was not for work. That afternoon he got back with lots of chips and dip and party stuff, but after he grabbed a few things he drove off again thinking that he was very clever. After he left Bossy and a few other cows went in his house to figure out what he was doing, and stop him, they did not find out what he was doing but they did find out his plan they found a piece of paper that said…

I don’t milk cows =cows begging to be milked = free milk!

They knew what was coming now so 20 of the 56 cows went out to get something; they came back with 56 adorable calves, and relieved themselves of their milk to the calves. Mr. McDonald got back and went straight to bed. The next morning he found out some startling news, ALL THE COW’S WERE GONE. Not just his everyone’s in his neighborhood. There was NO milk. Or cows ether.  He started to look franticly for them but to no avail he looked in the barn, the pasture, and everywhere else, (that a cow may be anyway.) it seemed that everyone was doing the same thing! Mr. McDonald had a memory just pop right back in his head, it was way back when he had no cows just 56 calves and 5 kids. It was a wonderful memory really, and then he started to think, had he treated the cows different then as he did as calves? No surely not…but then again…maybe so…but how was he to make up now? All his cows were gone, nobody had any. Then just as the memory, something else popped in his head. He jumped in his truck and drove crazily to the end of his drive way and further down the street to the left and strait to the… barber shop? He ran in sliding to a screeching halt with everyone looking at him he said: quick! What’s on C-span!? The man said: you know I don’t like that stuff!

Chapter 3 Road Trip…

Mr. McDonald reached over and turned on the TV, and there they were! Sitting in the audience, in WASHINGTON DC!!! He knew they loved politics but not THAT much. So he went home and looked for his piggy-bank so that he could fly to Washington DC, well, he found it, only empty, “the cows must have taken it…” he said. Now how was he going to get them? All he had was 50 dollars and a… Electric car! He hopped in and drove, and drove, and drove, and drove, and drove! Until he got there 23 hours later, and of course the cows left before he got there. It seems the cows rented a RV, wait let me clarify, a HUGE RV, and are driving across the country, which was very bad news for Mr. McDonald, who was extremely TIRED after that Enormous trip. So he got a room at a hotel and slept…for a LONG time… a very LONG time. Meanwhile the cows were having a BLAST! They were touring caves, riding rollercoaster’s and even going to MOOvie theaters, but soon they learned they had unsufishant funds, for when they tried to buy something they were not able to, for some reason. Mr. McDonald had spent all his money too so he had to go back home, but the unluckier cows could not for they did not even have that much. So the cows got a job at a chickfilay doing photography for them (btw they made their own signs), for at least until they could buy a ticket home. Mr. McDonald did not have enough money to stay at his ranch so he had to buy a apartment in the city where he was making half the money when he had been selling milk, so there he stayed always wanting to go back home, but this was his chance to buy it back, it had just gone up for sale, but alas he did not have proper funding for this great investment of time and money. The cows on the other hand were millionaires and forgot all about their beloved home, and stayed in the little town they had been staying in with lots of “MOOla” they liked to say. but one day that all changed, one of the cows was watching their 2,000 dollar TV with blue-ray and all those other TV add-on’s  anyway she was skipping though the MANY, MANY, channels when she came across one of those “house for sale” channels with  the house she lived in for so many years and she remembered all the things that she had done there, and then came the extremely wanting to go home that she had before, then she realized, all these houses are for sale…then she ran to tell the other cows this new news and soon everyone would be packing their suitcases and getting ready to buy, then go home. Mr. McDonald had lost all hope of going home and of finding his cows. The cows got in an airplane and waited, for a long time infect, until there they were, home, but first of course they had to buy it…but then it was there house…of course. Then they remembered one small detail…WHERE WAS MR. MCDONALD? They searched and searched…well, you get the point…right? Oh well, they found him, in jail, for trespassing. But it was’ent THAT much money, well, so it was A LOT of money but not SO much for a millionaire cow, ok so the cows were broke, it’s not a big deal…maybe. But they did infact find a job! It was photography since they had really good experience with it, but it did take awhile, but they did it finally, they did it and they were going home.

Chapter 4 it’s Getting’ Weirder!

Just before they went to bed, he wanted to do a head count to make sure all of them came safe and sound, so he did.  He got to 55, so where was the other one? He had to go to bed so he went but first he wrote a letter to “Bossy” the cow that had been writing letters to him it said…


Dear Mrs. Bossy.

I was extremely worried about you all, and I am very pleased to have you all with me again, and I hope that you will have a wonderful time at the party that I’m giving in honor of your return. Really am glad to have you back.

Truly, and Sincerely,

Mr. McDonald

Then he ran out and put it in the barn as fast as he could tripping over the chickens he finally got there, and stuck the new letter on the side of the barn with a push-pin thing and went inside and went to bed, and then of course went to sleep. The next morning he got some very, or extremely, startling, or scary, news. It was a letter; don’t get me wrong letters are fun, but not THIS kind, no this kind of letter is like a bill, really not so fun. It read…


Dear Mr. McDonald,

I have information for you, which I think you should give your complete and undivided attention to. This is not Bossy, this is in fact Clover E. Swiss from across the street, my line of work is detective work and I have been watching your cows for a long time, and they seem very smart and independent, but I have some very disturbing news it seems that your cows are of were secret agents, as am I but cows don’t just come like that they were implanted with some chip-devise that makes cows almost human, (accept for the outside look of course) but for that very strange but same reason she has been cow-napped. As I said I have been working with your cows for a very long time and with many a case such as: the stolen cheese incident, and 2401 (sorry but that one is undisclosed at the moment), and very, very, many, many, others. Mrs. Bossy has been taken to who knows where with who knows who, to say it plainly. I am very extremely sorry for this incident and the CIA organization will get you another cow and if you wish we will take the chips out of the other cows to avoid any other mishaps or we may even find her if you like. Please answer in your next letter.


Clover E. Swiss , for the CIA (Cows, International, Agents)

Mr. McDonald was very shocked by this extremely shocking news, so right then and there he began to write furiously, this made the letter less polite and more frantic. It read…


Dear Mrs. Clover,

Please ask the leader of your organization this: WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO MY COWS AND WHERE IS MY COW?!? And also that of course I want you to look for her.


Mr. McDonald

All of this he did with great speed, making it “sloppy” so he ran outside again tripping over farm animals such as chickens, and also again he stuck it on the side of the barn and went back in and waited impatiently, for a long time, he also kept going outside checking over, and over, and over again, ‘til finally he found a letter, he opened it making the worst face, as if he had been angery over it taking SO long (btw it only took 5 minutes). It read…

Dear Mr. McDonald,

I do not need to tell the leader this for he only knows that he did this for the good of international dairies and cows, which I think is a very extremely good answer.


Clover E. Swiss, for the CIA (Cows, International, Agents,)

They wrote nasty letters back and forth for awhile, until they ran out of paper and one got back to the point, “ We need to find her!” she said, then Mr. McDonald rememberd that she WAS gone and that THEY needed to FIND her (boy, capitals are fun!), so off the two went running and of course tripping over farm animals to look for they’re long lost friend and spy.

Chapter 5 Goin’ all Out On Spy’s.

So there went the two rescuers to rescue the person needing rescuing, ( wow that’s a mouthful) anyway there they went, looking for there beloved cow. Until (because everything is more exieting with “until”) Clover (Agent C) saw a black 15 pasenger van with no windows accept for the front, Clover with her quick thinking mind threw a metallic tracking bug on the side of the van and then she pulled out her laptop tracking thingy and started tracking it, it made a left, a right, a right, a left, until it pulled into a driveway and…VANished, (get it?) Clover and Mr. McDonald stood stairing and blinking… for about two minutes, then finally they came to, and Clover ran up to the exsact place the car VANished and took pictures and set another tracking bug. And she said that they needed to go to the head courters (HQ) and get some back up, of course Mr. McDonald agreed number 1 she has to have a lot of wepons number 2 she waighs over 2,000 pounds more than he does so he really did not have a couse in the matter. So off they went to the HQ to get some “Back Up’s” he did not know what a HQ was or what “backup’s” were, but off they went, on the way Clover said “be on your best behaveour” and he nodded his head back at her. Then they got into a little tube, or actuly a big tube, big enough for a full grown cow let alone a tiny 150 pound man. Then they walked in Mr. McDonald was looking around and oooohing and ahhhhing at all the HUGE cows, there was: milk cows, beef cows, and show cows all in one room without a human in sight, accept Mr. McDonald of course (of course I had to say of course again), then they walked into a office with a big door big enough for a cow infact, anyway they walked in and sat down on the big sofa and looked at the tellivision screen, a cow with a tucksedoe on popped up on the screen, “he said hello agent Clover, and a human?!?”’ just a second” he said a cow on the intercom said  “Agent Clover please come to the bosses office, if you would please.” Clover went out of the small room and left Mr. McDonald by himself. Then the whole room changed and a door opened a voice said “Please enter to become a agent” so he did he saw a huge table full of food he ran up and stuffed himself all the way to the top and the voice said again “please come in,” and a door opened so of course he walked in and saw a work out station he looked one glace and ran the other way but the door shut and the voice said “work out and you may leave” so he waited and waited until finaly he started working out, and the door opened he walked out and saw Clover glaring at him right in front of him but think about it that would be a exetemely scary sight, then he started running back to the workout area as fast as his legs could carry him then the door shut and he smacked his face and every other part of him on the door.

Chapter 6 A Scary Sight!

and Clover said “ Are you playing around again McDonald?” he said “ Oh of course not, umm…Ok, well I heard this voice asking me to go in here so I did, what was I supposed to do?” “Never mind, the boss is ready for us to come in.” she said. So there they went. They came in and sat down right on the grass colored couch, and then a HUGE cow came up to them and whispered to Clover as if he were mad at her, and then he turned on the television set and sat down on the sofa. The movie started and Mr. McDonald started shoving pop-corn down his scrawny little neck, and of course started coughing. Apparently the movie was about spy’s, the movie said “ 10 out of 15 % of spy’s die each year leaving everyone to wonder how we still have spy’s, we of course can’t answer this, no one really knows why not, but we aren’t going to say this, in this, mixed company. Anyway here are the rules to being a spy/cow spy, #1 don’t fight with other agents about anything, use dehorning paste. #2 don’t chew cud indoors, it makes a tribal mess, and I just had the carpet cleaner come to remove grass stains. #3 only use weapons when needed, ‘cause some unnamed wisecow went out to the shooting range with most of the bullets. #4 always wear a cleaned and freshly ironed suit to the HQ, the boss likes it better that way. #5 always make sure to move the field agents, leaving them in one pasture for too long, makes that field worthless. #6 Make sure to use soap before you come in the HQ, we don’t want to many flies in here, it was only last Tuesday when I had to call “frogs pest control”. #7 eat all your kelp and you will be good to go, yeah need to get in all those minerals yeah know?  And last of all #8 do not, <repeat> do not at all bring a human in the HQ, this place is classified folks! With all that said I would like to welcome these new cows to our organization, <television clicks off>, “That means all of you!” said The Boss, all of them looked up in surprise, the boss looked the most angry he had ever looked, so there they were looking at him…it was kind of awkward, but then the silence stopped when Mr. McDonald looked up and said “I’m hungry…” then they looked at him, he said ” what?!?”  then they said ” oh nothing…”  then they all got up and went into the cafeteria, Mr. McDonald ate (for dessert) “cow pies” then he found out what they were made of, and started spitting incessantly, And the others looked at him, then they went into a room and 6 cows came in, the boss said while he pointed at them from right to left “this is: Apocrypha Holstein, we don’t really know what her name is all about but this is: MOOlinda Ayshire, Gus Angus, Immen C. Hereford, Drew P. Brahman, Tex L. Horn, This is the serious 6, they will be your back-up agents, they will help you, but RESPECT THEM.” that left them kind of scared, then the boss said ” go on, find that cow!”

Chapter 7 Workin’ On The Case

“Even heroes get the blues.” thought the boss. So off they went, “finding that cow!” and got stuck in the door… but…could not get out…ok…they got out…but as I was saying they got out and went back to the “crime scene” to find…nothing. Most people would think this is the end…But just as they were calling it quits…a miracle happened. Just out the window of the HUGE van, the cows saw…Bossy B Holstein! Could it be? Nope, I guess not. So they were back to sucare one. thinking they were never going to find her, they went home, but when Mr. McDonald finally got to sleep…again there was footsteps, or stomps…yeah yeah I know that we have been though this already…but this time it was deferent…It was not a cow…it was a HUMAN BEING, holding a letter in his hand, and by the sound of it he was not a small dude ether, in fact he was downright LARGE. But anyway he put that letter the same place that the cows did, on the bed-side-table, then just like that, he was gone. The next morning Mr. McDonald woke up and found this letter on his table and just like the other letter it was not very peppy.


Dear Mr. McDonald,

If you pay your cows will stay, if not they won’t be so hot.


Your watcher


Bring the money to:

64701 Joseph cir New Market TN at six in the afternoon under the tree.

This would be very disturbing if he was more awake…but it was still kind of scary. Well he did what anyone would do…went back to sleep. Meanwhile back at the HQ everyone was up and doing stuff, even the boss…but like Mr. McDonald he was asleep…then Clover came in, she said “Sir.” He was very surprised, he jumped right out of his seat, doing this he said “oh yes, yes, of course…” and he adjusted his seat to where he was not laying down so much and pressed a button on his remote thingy, and a TV came right out of his wall after he did this he got a big anchovy and peanut butter sandwich from his little tiny fridge he got the sandwich beside the grass-shake, and the alfalfa peanut-butter next to his desk, he ate it…and liked it! Clover shoke her head in dis belive and went into her large office, she sat a minute waiting for someone to come in disturbing he quiet little moment, but seeing that no one did she slinked over to the phone and picked it up and started dialing…just as she started a conversation unactspectedly the backups came in and sat down, waiting for her to finish her unalowed visit on the phone. Seeing that they came in she stopped her little “chat” and said “Yes, how may I help you?” The leader said ” Umm, it seems that the workers have found something worth coming for.” as if she said some “magic” words Clover went into the cubicles to see what was the cause of all this ruckus. The “Back-Ups” went back to their office wondering what she was on the phone for, and why…but they would have more things to think about after a few minutes, then the few minuits went by, and it happened…Mr. McDonald came in with his letter he found earlier. He went straight to the people he had seen before and handed the letter over. Then he waited for someone to do something…and nothing happened. So he went back home. But someone was in his DRIVE-WAY!!! He drove up and that person went the other way! he started to fallow them but he remember the letter he had got earlier and instead turned around and drove back up his drive-way, very fast it looked as if he was a crazy driver if he had any license at all, but anyway he drove up to his barn and got out really quick, and ran for the barn. When he got in there he started a head count,”1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10….” then after quite a few he got to 54??? “What? That can’t be!?” he said and started counting again thinking it was just a mistake, and again he got to 54…and he was gone? What? No one does this to a narrorater and gets away with it! Wait, wait, what…some on left me with COWS! Oh my word. Someone is getting punched…ahem? The end of chapter 7? Anybody? Ring a bell? ding ding? I have to do everything around here…THE END OF CHAPTER 7. how was that?

Chapter 8 Alone.

Ok so I was at a dairy farm in AK, alone, sad hungrury…well, I actually have ancestors who were Hungarian…but that’s not what I meant, I meant that I’m hungry…well, so what I already ate a “really Big Chicken- sand witch” from “jack in the box” but you get my point. Ok, so you don’t, just play along! I was going for effect! And now you ruined it all, I dislike you. Ok wait I’m getting sidetracked, but oh well, I do that a lot. But he is not here, oh wait… there he is, down on the floor, screaming in pain. That’s perfectly normal…wait, screaming in pain? Oh! Poor Mr. McDonald! How long has he been down there? Oh well I better call 911! <Beep boop boop> “hello?”   later that day, at the hospital…”Mr. McDonald, the doctor will come in shortly,” said the nurse Mr. McDonald groaned ” uhh huh” and the nurse left, Mr. McDonald was alone…for a few minutes…that is…then the large doctor came in, “Hello, and how are you felling?” said the doctor, “Ihm fheelin hokea,” Mr. McDonald replied, the doctor nodded as if he knew what Mr. McDonald was saying and left. Then oddly enough they let Clover come in, she said, “Hello, McDonald.” and handed him the flowers. Politely he said “hank uo couver.” she smiled and said “why are you talking like that? Did they give you that medicine that is supposed to help the pain but has those side-effects? Such as: sore thought, and cold symptoms?” he looked at her miserably and said “mhh huh. Dat togh ih horibul. Ave uo aoll fouond anyting, abou’ de case yet?” clover responded “yes in fact, they said that the letter you gave us was printed off a computer so there is no way to track it, so we’re back to square one.” “Hmm… Iow be, tinging ’bout it.” Mr. McDonald said thoughtfully. Clover left, leaving Mr. McDonald utterly, and totally, alone. Being alone Mr. McDonald lay down and nodded off. He envisioned the black van, if he could remember the person driving…nope, it was no use. He couldn’t do it, then he started thinking, or “tinking” the only person who knew the combination to the lock on the door to the shed was his son who helped out his dad when he was gone, but surely not, him. He was his pride and joy, and other than that he did not know anybody else who knew, except, naw, that couldn’t be…but then again…could it? He awoke by the doctor, Mr. McDonald we will have to do an emergency surgery; Mr. McDonald looked at him as if he had a question. The doctor made him go without another word; Mr. McDonald looked discussed at the behavior of him. They started going down the halls, quicker, and quicker, and quicker still. Mr. McDonald looked very disturbed now he said “doctor, can we slow down please?” then the doctor said “What’s the fun of that?” “well we are going quite fast…” said Mr. McDonald at this time they were running out of wall, Mr. McDonald said ” umm…we don’t have anywhere to go!” soon they started going down the stairs, running over various people. The doctor said “see? Not a problem!” Mr. McDonald looked at the doctor, seemed to be peeling off!! The actual person was A COW! He started looking for something to do…there was clover! “HELP! MAD COW! HELP, CLOVER!!!” he said clover started looking around the back of her trunk of her huge car, then she found what she was apparently looking for so much but too late! Mr. McDonald was gone.

Chapter 9 Gone?!

Clover was left in a hospital parking lot, just where we left her…meanwhile, Mr. McDonald was sitting unconscious under-ground, he got woken up by short yet stout furry cow, seeing this (like most people would) he began saying “Awww…look at her!” but like most people do (as he had done here) he mistook this furry cow for a girl. This of course was wishful thinking, he was wrong. The angry furry cow started running at him with his horns, until, another cow swiftly came in and stopped him. “Save it, boy.” he said the furry cow stopped and stood up against the wall, still glaring at Mr. McDonald. Mr. McDonald was scared to death about be captive, the suspicious cow who stopped the furry one started circling Mr. McDonald, and said “Hello, Mr. McHebert,” “the name’s McDonald!” Mr. McDonald said. The cow said “whatever… Bos primigenius?”  The furry cow walked up and said “yeah, Bovini?” “Go get the tester ready.” Said Bovini “I’m on it boss.”  Said Bos primigenius ( or BP) and the furry cow (BP) went into another room, “ I…is t…the tester f…for me?!” Mr. McDonald said stutteringly “Of course it is! Naw, just kidin’ it’s for the guy across the hallway.mot to say that you won’t be next…Ha,ha, ha, <sighs>, <muttering> this is getting boring, like it’s a “wild” bore…hey, BP, listen to my joke!” he said and eventually walked off. Mr. McDonald was alone yet again, he tried but, to no avail. Back at the hospital…clover was looking for a sign, a clue, a track, anything, so she retraced his steps to see if he had possibly left something. She went up the stairs, up the hallways, all the way to Mr. McDonald’s room. There was a lady in there, cleaning up. Clover asked “Have you seen anything strange going on?” the lady said “well there was a cow dressed up like a doctor taking a patent away…” “No, no, not that, I mean before, or after.” Clover said. “Well let’s see. Nope I uhh haven’t seen anything…” the lady said and left quickly as if she was hiding something. Clover looked at her wonderingly, “could she be…” she thought “Naw.  It couldn’t be.” She reassured herself, but still kept that lady as one of the suspects. She scribbled something on her note-pad, <don’t ask how> and again started looking. She looked under the bed, around it, and all over, but she did not find anything, what was she going to do? She started walking back, thinking, thinking so much that she bumped into someone, <wich is very easy for a cow…> she said “oh, sorry. I’m being clumsy today…” the lady just looked at her, Clover feeling very embarrassed walked off to the side, “that was rude…” she thought until…she almost fell out a window! She stepped back and said “that’s a teribal place for a window!” everyone else looked at her for a minute, then they got back to work. Now Clover felt really embarrassed. “I have to pay attention!” she said to herself. She popped in the elevator, but this was not a bright idea, for her and the other people started going down extremely fast, when the repairman finally got it to where they got out, Clover was so embarrassed that she wanted to hide her face for all and eternity. But this would not be possible for someone who was about to…oh…oww, that’s gotta hurt.

Chapter 10 the Painful Actcedent.

After she had this accident she vowed that she would never go out of  her house. So it was plainly time for the “back-up’s” to “show their stuff”, so to speak. So off they went, Apocrypha was the first to pipe up, “Ok…now what?” she said. All the other looked at her, Moolinda said “Look for Mr. McDonald of course!” Gus said “Moolinda, don’t yell at Apocrypha. You know she suffers from “Dorieism”” Immen said “ Gus! She does not! You liar!” Quit fighting, it makes my brain hurt.” Said Drew wimpishly. Tex said while pointing his horns at them (accept for Drew) “ Ya’ want me ta’ run ‘um thru Drew?” Apocrypha (ACP) said “Guys! He should for all you’ve been fighting!” “You too Apocrypha…” Said Tex ACP started looking at him disturbed. “…You started it!” Tex Finished. Then the Boss came in, amiditly  all of them stopped fighting and stood in an orderly fashion, and all of them said ( accept The Boss) “Yes, Sir?” The Boss said “Oh, I was just checking, it sounded a lot like you all were fighting…” “Oh of course not…” said Gus “What were you doing, then?” The Boss asked “Well…Umm…we were…Practicing Tie Kwon Dow! Yeah! Yeah, just practicing.” Immen said with a smile of relive. “Ok then, so you aren’t getting into trouble, are you?” The Boss asked yet again. “No Naw, just…doing what we said we were…”said Moolinda “Ok, well you all should go to the hospital, where he was kidnapped, ok? Here’s the address. Take your time when you get there…” Said The Boss. “Ok!” they said. So off they went looking for the lost people. Clover  was feeling really “Down in the Dumps” lately, all she did was wake up in the morning and eat, sleep, watch TV and use the “heifers room”. She clearly needed a “pick me up” so her loving neighbor came up to her door and gave her flowers, and chocolate. This would be very thoughtful if she were human, but alas she was not. So she gave them back to her loving human neighbor said thanks and walked back to her TV set. Many loving people tried this many times, but like her neighbor, it did not work, for they did not know what cows have for “pick me ups”. Meanwhile (wow a lot of meanwhile’s…)back at the “bad persons (or cow)”s place Mr. McDonald was VERY bored, he could not get up, yet he did not really want to at the moment. , for if he got up then he would be in the path of a rolling table, for patents, all the cows were doing something, like the cow to the left of him was giving a stomach-ache-actimy, to another cow, and to the right of him there was a cow telling the other cows orders “I’m hungry! Get me a chicken sandwitch,Abondance! Ankole!Watusi! I thought I told you to use soap next time!” all this time each one listened and did what he commanded. This was a very strange sight, at least for a dairy man in Alaska. Mr. McDonald, did not know what in the world that he was going to do. So he slept. Really, what would YOU do, that is if you did not have a thing in the world that  you could do, but sleeping, and being awake? Ok, so he fell in a deep slumber. You got it, apparently he did not have very good dreams but that does not mean that he did not have a good rest, no in fact he had the best sleep he had had in awhile. He dreamt about all the things that had happened to him this year, a lot to think about, so it was an extremely long dream, or it felt like it at least. he got to where he was thinking about before he got to the hospital, he did remember, he was cradling his leg in pain while the narrator was calling someone, he watched as the narrator got the directions to the hospital that the person on the other side told him to go…wait! So that person KNEW where I was going…and the only person who the narater would talk to would be…all at once Mr. McDonald struggled until he got free, everyone in the room looked they all knew he was here! Now how was he going to go? The serious six came flying in! With their laser things they put a ring around all the “bad cows” and they got caught!!! By someone chuckling in the shadows. Their only hope was Clover! Back at Clover’s house, she got a phone call, at first she did not want to answer but she did finally, “hello?” she said “Clover! WE NEED YOU. We have a tracking bug! So you can find us if you really wanted to! Please. Clover, you are the best, spy agent, and cow to ever walk the earth! If you save us then I would love to have you as MY cow, Clover, just…HELP US!!!” Mr. McDonald said then got cut off. Clover sat there a moment, but regaining her courage she ran to the rescue! But since she had no car, she went first, to the bus-stop. But at the evil-cow’s hide out evil things were happening(You don’t say? what a concept!)…”you’ll never get away with this!!!” said ACP “everyone says that and I always do and will.” said the dark creation. “w..what a..a..Are y…you going t…to do t…to u…us?” said Drew  “oh many nastily bad things. I don’t really want to get into it before lunch.” The Dark thing said. “AHHH!” all the captives said “I know, Maybe I will BRUSH YOUR TEETH WITH REALLY SPICY TOOTH-PASTE! HA, HA, HA!!! And…AND NOT GIVE YOU ANY WATER! Yes, yes, I LOVE that plan, I shall go to all the “Walgreens” and “Wal-Marts” and buy all the really spicy tooth-paste! Kiss your unspicy mouths good-bye!! Ha,ha,ha, I’m a GENIUS!” The Bad guy said and left slamming the door behind him. Then Clover came in! “CLOVER!” all the captivated captives yelled, clover quickly unlocked the doors of the cages that her friends were in and ran outside to the “Cow” guard and the Police who were holding the very bad bad-guy, it was…The Boss?!? “The end” said the narrator “…and to all a good night.” “But what about, Bossy?!? The world may never know.” He said

The End


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I'm a spunky, fun-lovin' 13 year old. I live on a 10 acre mini-farm, with my 5 siblings and 2 parents, Dad, Mom, Russian Panda, Shorty, Alfred, HH, and Klingon, the newest member to our funny little clan. Everyday (since January 2013) I have been wearing a tophat and or bowtie, sometime everyday. I'm hoping my New Year's resolution will last. :3

T Minus…

Copy Writing Is Not Nice!

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